From: ISN (isn_editor_3@hotmail.com)
Date: Sunday, September 19, 1999 11:46 PM

THIS IS INTERSTELLAR NEWS FOR SEPT 19, 2999 (WEEKLY EDITION)

POLUTION ON MANTON PRIME OUT OF CONTROL

MANTON CITY, MANTON PRIME: The Capital of the Federation is in its 30th day of a severe pollution advisory. Federal scientists are frantically trying to combat the haze and smog that had covered the city and paralyzed its inhabitants. City leaders blame the current crisis on auto emissions and cow flatulence.

NOW YOU SEE IT, NOW YOU DON'T

TEMPORAL SHIFTS DISRUPT TRADING

Traders throughout the universe encountered server malfunctions and program glitches yesterday and today as the universe seemed blink on and off in a temporal flux. Many traders saw planets that disappeared before their eyes and port that ceased to exist temporarily. Federal authorities are investigating the problem, however they suspect that Ensign Wesley Crusher and the crew of the Enterprise had something to do with it.

IRA BOMBS PORT IN SECTOR 2300

NEUTRAL SPACEPORT, SECTOR 2300: Explosions rocked the Flea Market at the GEORGE W. BUSH SPACE PORT shortly before 6am local time. Several airlocks were blown resulting in the "spacing" of several traders and tourists. The local Federal authorities received a message from the IRA (Insect Rights Army) claiming responsibility, " We at the IRA believe that insects were not put on this earth (or galaxy) to entertain us. Cruel treatment of these poor beings are being documented everyday. Glued to small wagons, bicycles, or other paraphenalia, they are made to pull these contraptions around with their agonized attempts to flea...errr flee."

WOULD YOU LIKE TO KNOW MORE??

http://www4.coastalnet.com/jsweevil/atrocities.htm

NEW SHIP IN DEVELOPMENT

FEDERAL SHIPYARDS, MARS: Due to the large size of the galaxy, a new class of faster ships are being developed for interstellar travel. Due out next year as part of the 3001 model year, Jeep will introduce the 3001 JEEP CHEROKEE 4x4 SPORT, with 4 megathruster engines giving an incredible 0-60 lightyears in 6.7sec--a new benchmark for Sport-Utility Space Vehicles. Estimated cost of the new Jeep is between $4,200,000 and $4,400,000 with standard equiptment. A optional jump drive and leather seats are available.

JOKE OF THE DAY

There are 3 types of Space Merchants:
Those who can count
Those who can't

- Character Poll -

How would you classify your character?

Results

WEB BORED QUOTE OF THE DAY

"no no no no no no no no I want to be a space merchant person"-miketsmith
"don't get me ticked plese"-miketsmith

TOP 10 REASON CAPT. KIRK IS BETTER THAN CAPT. PICARD

-The only time Kirk put his phaser on stun was when he was looking for sex.
-Kirk never drinks tea. Ever.
-Kirk would never waste a holodeck on something stupid like Dixon Hill.
-Kirk never wore green tights and frolicked about in Sherwood Forest.
-The first Enterprise didn't have a lounge.
-Kirk wasn't some prissy archaeology geek.
-When Kirk says "Boldly Go" he MEANS it.
-Kirk once made a cannon out of bamboo, sulphur, potassium nitrate and charcoal, and fired diamonds into the heart of his enemies. (Need we say more?)

SOCIETY PAGE

Many thanks to MRS. HUTT for sending this baby video of her son JABBA

AT THE MOVIES

TONIGHT ON SPACE MERCHANT CABLE NETWORK

7:00 2 Guys, a Thevian and a Creonti Fried Chicken Place
7:30 3rd Port from the Sun
8:00 Creonti Hope

TODAYS ISN BROUGHT TO YOU BY:

DELUSION GENERATOR: "Makes you think that you're a good trader even when you suck".
And
ALSKANT EXPRESS: "Never leave Fed Protection without it"

EDITORIAL

We need your comments as characters, alliance news, photos (especially photos) and juicy bits of gossip so we can have something to write about. We have been away from the game for a long time, so please do not be offended if I get my facts mixed up from time to time. ;-)

e-mail us at:
isn_editor_3@hotmail.com